A retired high school 70 yrs old teacher, mother of 2 daughters Mrs. Uma is an enthusiastic & busy in Diwali preparations & planning. Her daughter Tara lecturer in college is also dreaming to enjoy festival by making different rangolis this time. She is fond of lighting diyas & colorful rangolis. She has planned to buy many colors this time & few tools for making the artistic designs after watching many you tube videos on rangoli making.
First day of Diwali has arrived but Tara is still busy with online lectures, webinars & important online meetings with her professionals. Her so called Diwali vacation is already cut down due to COVID. Still she is trying her best to help clean the house, got pest control done, got carpenter work done, etc. She ordered beautiful decoration items from Jaipur as well.
Since few days, Uma has been insisting her for a Toran to be hanged at the main door. Tara was sick for 2-3 days amidst her such a busy schedule so she kept requesting Uma to wait & she would surely put the Toran once she is feeling better. But as usual Uma can’t stop telling her to get the Toran hung anyhow.
Today Tara was feeling better so she assured her that she will surely be putting up the Toran. In fact Tara loves decorating house. She thought lets use more artificial flowers this time & put different Toran. Meanwhile again Uma came to her saying put the Toran now. But it was the time for Tara’s online class, so Tara said, let me finish my online lecture than I shall do it.
Tara completed her class & got out from her room & as it was afternoon 1 o’clock, she told Uma lets have lunch. Uma yelled at her loudly & angry, ‘ Go, you have the lunch…”. Uma was putting the Toran herself when she rudely spoke to Tara this way. Tara was badly hurt. She could not eat. She lost her total mood for Diwali celebration. She cleaned the kitchen, did the left out household work quietly. Tara made a rangoli with old left over colors just for sake of Uma but her dreams of celebrating, decorating the house in her way shattered badly.
Friends, you might be feeling what’s the big deal about this incident. Such things happen in routine life. But if you carefully notice, the peace of Tara, Uma & the house got lost due to the unnecessary insistence & stubborn demand of Uma to put the Toran WHEN SHE SAID. She insisted that the work should be done as PER HER SAY IMMEDIATELY. Tara never denied doing it, she only wanted some time as she had her genuine reasons. In fact she too was willing to do it in a more creative way.
Friends, now think are you a person like Uma? Are you trying to control, be a dictator to others? Are you a very insisting rigid stubborn person who wants things as per they say as per their time? If yes, please take a pause & think over what are you doing with others by behaving this way……..
Festivals are for everyone to enjoy & everyone has their own ways to celebrate. Don’t push your loved ones so much that they go away from you far off & also get lost. The insistence of parents, senior old people about celebrating festivals in certain ways only, being so much demanding, do you think it’s appreciable? What if the Toran was hung little late? What if the Toran was not hung at all? Uma was 70 years of age, she must have seen at least 60 Diwali festivals in her lifetime, what will happen if in one Diwali the Toran is hung little late?? Joy & happiness are in being with our family together, seeing them happy, not in how you celebrate the festival material way !!!! What’s the gain of such decoration by Uma if her own daughter is badly hurt by her for merely a toran hanging job??!! Why we have to show others how we have decorated the house when we can’t decorate our hearts with love for others? Why world’s approval is needed for becoming happy for any festival?
So many Indian mother-in-laws & mothers insist on cleaning the houses & get their daughters & daughter-in-laws work like hell for Diwali cleaning just because they believe DURING DIWALI CLEANING SHOULD BE DONE. But how many of them indeed clean themselves??!! Also how many of them give up the unused things? They simply get it cleaned & put them back again. Why can’t we make Diwali a joyful happening for our daughters & daughter-in-laws? Why we make festival a burden for them? What if few things remain unlearned?
Let’s take a pause & indeed take time to think, what we need to clean & what we need to decorate this festive season.
A very Happy Diwali to You all.